Bad habits that are blocking happiness

Today’s scribble is based on how to live a happier life!!! Of course if everyone knows the secrets, than there will not be any sad or worrying people in the world. I don’t know too.

But what I know, is some of the things which I am doing which causes unhappiness for me. So a simple maths, just don’t do those stuff and you will be happier!!! Ok easier said than can be done but it doesn’t hurt to try it right? Haha, bear with me and read the following pointers on what not to do for a happier life from my experience which i will also follow hopefully.
The very first thing to get rid of is the habit of comparison. This habit has been ingrained into us since we are young. Parents will usually say, “See that kid, he/she have done so well in exams. You must be like him etc.” The problem is parents usually meant well, and true enough at that age we may be not very matured so we follow the habit of performing academically well than others. But this becomes an issue if you continues the habit even after you reach adulthood. It only creates unhappiness. And now you have a widespread tool to look at what others are doing and compare it to yours. It is called Facebook!!

Yes, many times when you look at your news feed and saw postings of your friends getting married, having kids, going on honeymoon or on status updates on how awesome their day out with their loved ones are, you may feel, “shit i am not even attached.” But let me tell you something, happiness is from within. Look for happiness from what you do. Latin Americans are the most happiest people in the world and Singaporeans are the least happiest [1]. Happiness is not derived from a particular combination. E.g. Being attached, living in big house and owing a car doesn’t automatically equate to happiness.
What is happiness is being contended with what you have and realising that your presense bring joy and happiness to others. Be happy internally and it will be reflected to others. Derive joy from small things in life like meeting and chatting with a close friend, doing a good job at work, interacting with your parents etc. if you are looking for love, STOP, it will find you. You may have experiences of being ignored/rejected by ones whom you like. The feeling of rejection is really painful and your self confidence really takes a hit. A remedy is to concentrate on really working hard at work and when your work is recognised, it will in turn makes you feel good.

“If you’re absent during my struggle, don’t expect to be present during my success.” – Will Smith [2] This quote is fantastic to remind yourself whenever you are faced with a rejection. You are who you are, your struggles, hardwork, failures and personality are the contents of you. Why dilute it to just appear as someone else? Those who ignore you whether in work or in personal life, let them be. They will realise what they have lost when they realise what a awesome life you are leading. So my advise, if you are looking for love (especially if you are quiet, reserved and introverted) stop it. It will find you, and it will be the most beautiful moment of your life to be cherished.

The second habit to get rid of is worrying. You only live once (YOLO), so why worry? Especially of failures or fears from trying new things? Do what you like and stop worrying after the future too much!!! I realised after some time, that I don’t even know what I am going to do in the next 15 minutes, but why am i worrying how i will be in the future like in 5 years time etc. So my advise, is stop worrying. This bad habit is in tandem with the first one of comparison. First you compare, then you worry why you are not like that. So remove the first habit and the second one gets reduced too. Many people dies from unatural reasons everyday. Road accidents, natural disasters etc. Can you tell when you will die? Nope, so why waste the time in between life and dead worrying? Do all you want to do as long as it doesn’t hurt others.

Okay the post has become long, so I will stop here. But the scribbles will continue as I realise my bad habits in the process of living. Haha but the key summary is stop comparing yourself to others which will lead to worrying . Be happy, have a positive outlook in life and live life to the max.

In short Live and Let Live 🙂

Reference:
[1] http://news.xin.msn.com/en/storyviewer-commented.aspx?cp-documentid=251355938
[2] http://quotivee.com/2013/articles/quote-explained-will-smith-if-youre-absent-during-my-struggle/#sthash.YLl0pFAf.dpuf

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